Advice after your nerve block for surgery
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We are very sorry for your loss
Please accept our deepest sympathies for the loss of your baby. We are very sorry this has happened to you.
We know this will be a very sad and difficult time for you and your family. You may have many questions or worries. We are here to help and support you.
You may have been told that your labour will be started so your baby can be born. This is called an induction of labour.
This page explains what may happen next and what you can expect. We will also talk through everything with you. Please ask us if anything is unclear or if you have any questions.
We will usually care for you in a quiet bereavement suite, if one is available. This room is next to the labour ward.
Your partner or family can stay with you. You will have your own bathroom.
If the bereavement suite is not available, the same midwives will care for you in another suitable room on the labour ward.
A senior doctor will talk to you about how your baby will be born.
Unless there is a medical reason not to, we usually recommend starting labour so you can give birth vaginally. This is often the safest option.
Stage One
We will offer you a tablet called Mifepristone. You take this tablet with water.
This medicine helps prepare your body for labour. The doctor will check that this medicine is safe for you.
After taking the tablet and having your blood pressure checked, you will usually go home. You can rest in your own space.
You will come back to the labour ward 48 hours later at a time agreed with you.
If you feel unwell, have pain, bleeding, or any discharge, please contact:
Labour ward triage:
Frimley Park Hospital: 0300 613 4527
Wexham Park Hospital: 0300 615 4520
Stage Two
When you return, we will give you another medicine called Misoprostol.
This tablet is either swallowed or gently placed into the vagina by a midwife. It helps start labour.
It can take time to work, so you may need more doses. During this time, we will regularly check your blood pressure, temperature, pulse, and breathing.
You can try simple ways to cope with pain, such as breathing exercises, relaxation, massage, or changing positions.
You can also have pain relief at any time. This includes tablets, injections, gas and air, pumps you control, or an epidural.
You do not need to decide straight away. You can change your mind during labour. Your midwife or anaesthetic doctor will talk through your choices with you.
A midwife will support you throughout your labour.
We will listen to what you want and help you feel as comfortable as possible. You will be encouraged to drink, use the toilet, move around, or rest - whatever feels right for you.
We will talk to you about your wishes, including whether you would like to see your baby straight away.
If you wish, we can gently dry, wrap, and dress your baby, or you can do this yourself. We will support whatever choice you make.
After your baby is born, the placenta also needs to be delivered. This is usually helped by an injection.
If the placenta does not come away on its own, we may suggest a procedure called a manual removal of placenta. This means going to theatre, having an anaesthetic, and a doctor gently removing the placenta by hand.
Some bleeding is normal during and after labour.
Your midwife will carefully watch how much bleeding you have. If it becomes heavy, we may give you extra medicines. We will always explain what is happening and tell you if we are worried.
You can go home when you feel ready.
We will make sure you have pain relief to take home if you need it. You can also take a medicine to stop your milk from coming in, if you wish - please discuss this with your midwife.
We will check that you are physically well before you leave hospital.
You will be able to see and hold your baby if you wish. Your baby can stay close to you and can be by your bedside if you would like this.
We can offer you handprints and footprints, a cot card, name bracelets, and a memory box to take home. You may also choose to wash, dress, and care for your baby yourself if you want to.
You may like to bring clothes, blankets, or a small toy for your baby. If you prefer, we can provide these items for you.
Photographs
We encourage you to take your own photos if you wish. We can also offer professional photographs of your baby for you to keep.
Hospital Chaplains are available at any time. They can arrange a blessing for your baby in a way that reflects your wishes and beliefs.
There is a Baby Memorial Book in the hospital chapel. If you want, your baby’s name can be added to this at a later date.
It is possible to take your baby home. Please tell us if this is something you would like to do, so we can support and guide you.
We will talk to you about whether you would like further tests or a post-mortem for your baby. You will be given written information, time to think, and the chance to ask questions.
If a post-mortem is agreed, your baby will be cared for at John Radcliffe Oxford University Hospital and will return to Frimley Park or Wexham Park Hospital after the tests. This can take up to three weeks.
A post-mortem may not always find a clear reason for your baby’s death, but it may help answer some questions and give useful information for future pregnancies.
You will be given an appointment to see a consultant to talk about the results. These usually take about 12 weeks.
The midwife will give you a certificate of stillbirth. You will need to take this to the Registrar of Births and Deaths.
The Registrar will give you a Certificate of Registration. This is needed before your baby’s funeral can be arranged.
If you and your partner are not married and want both names on the registration, you must attend the appointment together.
By law, the stillbirth must be registered within 42 days.
You do not need to decide straight away, but you will need to think about funeral arrangements for your baby.
Take time to talk together about what feels right for you. The midwife can give you a list of local funeral directors.
You can choose either a burial or a cremation.
A community midwife will visit you at home the day after you leave hospital.
Specialist bereavement midwives will also contact you to offer further support and home visits.
You will usually be given an appointment to see your obstetric consultant 8–12 weeks after leaving hospital. This appointment gives you and your partner time to talk about what happened and discuss any test results.
It may help to write down any questions you want to ask and take them with you.
The midwives work closely with Sands, a charity that supports parents after the death of a baby.
If you would like to talk to other parents who have been through a similar experience, you can contact Sands using the details on the back of this leaflet.
Every year, the hospital holds a memorial service for families who have lost a baby before or after birth.
- At Frimley Park Hospital it takes place on the second Sunday in May
- At Wexham Park Hospital it takes place in mid November
- For more details, you can contact:
- the bereavement team
- the hospital chaplain
- Sands representatives
Contact us
If you have any queries relating to this information, please contact the Maternity service.
About this information
Service:
Maternity
Reference:
M/028
Approval date:
1 March 2026
Review date:
1 March 2029
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Important note
This page provides general information only. It is developed by clinical staff and is reviewed regularly every 3 years for accuracy. For personal advice about your health, or if you have any concerns, please speak to your doctor.