15 October 2021

Baby Ellis was stillborn at Frimley Park Hospital on 21 June 2019, one day after his due date.

He is the son of Emma and Trevor Geldenhuys and the little brother of Ruby, then aged 3. Emma gave birth to Ellis in the Rowan suite supported by Frimley Health’s specialist bereavement midwifery team who were with them from the day they were told of the loss of Ellis, through the subsequent birth and the difficult weeks and months that followed.

Ellis’ Mum Emma said: “They were the worst days of our lives, but we did feel completely supported by the specialist bereavement team. The midwives were clear, compassionate and concise and gave me an answer to even the most difficult questions. They just seemed to be able to read me really well, they are the most caring couple of ladies.”

Emma’s background is in events and hospitality and she had been involved in charity work throughout her career so the family decided to set up a fundraising page in memory of Ellis to help raise money for the hospital. The couple’s wider family and friends joined them to form ‘Team Ellis’, a 37 strong team who have already raised more than £7500 for the Rowan Suite at Frimley Park Hospital. Various members of the team have taken part in Run Frimley for the last two years, as well as the Tough Mudder challenge, receiving enough donations towards soundproofing and redecorating the specialist maternity suite.

For this Baby Loss Awareness Week, the theme is wellbeing which Emma feels “is massively important for anyone impacted by baby loss, taking the time to learn to look after yourself is one of the most important things I’ve learnt”. Emma also called for more education around the subject of baby loss: “People rarely know the right things to say but it’s the simple things like asking the baby’s name which can mean so much. There is much more that could be done and better education would make it easier for bereaved families to process such a tragic loss.”

If you would like to donate to Team Ellis, please see visit www.justgiving.com/fundraising/in-memory-of-ellis. Emma also has a blog www.stillbeingmummy.co.uk with a resources page for information to help other families.